The scar is still there, a circle shape pressed deep into the knee.
Dark pinpoints mark where gravel hit hard, tiny razor stones plucked later with tweezers once the blood stopped pooling.
Eyes brimmed hot blurring the sidewalk when I walked my bicycle up Cottage Street. My almost teenaged self burned anger, embarrrassment, and flesh- opened pain.
My bicycle betrayed me that day behind Flagg’s Pharmacy.
Or was that me?
Me looking down down down to where I was and not to where I wanted to be.
Me twisting the handle bars wrong, steering toward the falling down place, because of the looking down down down.
Mission : Not Accomplished.
The stumblings, the trippings, the falling downs.
The sinkings that leave the mission of living wholly, even holy, compromised.
Peter, the rash one, the daring one, the confident one, became the sinking one because he wasn’t watching where he was going.
It’s not enough to just look at Jesus, to watch Him from a distance.
It is when we look at Him and move toward Him that we are able to live wholly, holy before the Lord God Almighty.
But there are so many skinned knees, so many road-rashed hearts.
So much falling down in this life.
Yet, there it is. His Word.
Jesus, the explanation of God, it declares.
‘tho a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again….
In another place it says there is none righteous; not. even. one.
Not even one who is good or noble or merciful or forgiving or trustworthy or just plain ” on the level,” as my father would say.
A carpenter’s words.
Jesus, another carpenter, says that I am on the level because He is on the level and He stands with me.
His standing, His right standing with His Father makes Him my Father, too.
I am right, righteous, full of right because all that’s right belongs to Jesus and He says I belong to Him. I am hidden in Him. My falling downs are not held against me, because I am hidden. His righteousness covers it all.
I have been made right. I can steer straight. I can look forward and not fear when I am airborne over the gravel places.
I just need to watch where I am going.
And if, no, when there is a falling down, I will rise again because I am hidden in what is full of right.
Hidden in one with the scars pressed deep.